New Year, New Me? We hear it constantly. Everyone picks a New Year Resolution and promises themselves to fulfill it within the next upcoming 365 days. The gyms are overpacked for the first few weeks of January as everyone is trying to lose weight but then they slowly die down as people fall into their old routines. You also have people pledging to stop drinking caffeine, making the lines at Starbucks a tad shorter but soon enough you’re waiting in a massive line for your Grande Early Grey Latte.
For this reason, I have decided this year that I don’t want to make a resolution. I want to begin 2016 with no expectations because majority of the good and the bad that will happen in the upcoming 365 days, they’re out of my control. The title of this blog is 2015, I Forgive You and to say this year has been an easy one would be a bold face lie. This is why I want to start 2016 with a clean slate, no more hurt, no more resentment, no more negativity, because how can I truly have an incredible New Year if I am still holding onto the past? When that ball drops in New York City and the clock strikes midnight, I can’t go back and touch 2015, so why would I let it continue to touch me? I believe I can do this with one word- forgiveness. In my heart, there is nothing more powerful yet vulnerable than this selfless action.
“There is more transforming and life giving power in forgiveness than in anger. There is more might and strength in mercy than in bitterness. There is more release and freedom in pardon than in judgement.”
Forgiving someone without being forgiven is difficult, it feels almost impossible to give away something that you haven’t received. However, in order to fight for your future, fight for your healing, break the chains and move forward with a clean slate, you have to do it. You have to choose love over anger and faith over fear. You have to forgive in order to try again, love again, dream again, & trust again. If you don’t forgive, you won't grow, and although it may be painful, nothing is more painful than staying stuck somewhere full of hurt, anger & fear.
So here I go, I forgive the man who deeply bruised my heart for a long time in the worst way. I say deeply bruised and not broken because broken means “having been fractured or damaged, no longer in one piece or working order." My heart is still working, it's just bruised, but it's working, it’s healing and most importantly it’s now forgiving. I forgive some of my once closest friends for falling off the face of the planet, when I needed you the most. I truly thank you for helping me see my true friends, the great memories we shared and I wish you nothing but happiness in the upcoming year. I forgive everyone that has attacked my dream coming true (YAM) and told me that my life wasn’t worth the fight, well look guys I made it another year!! Someone once told me that everyone’s life is like a clay jar. The more you’re hurt, dropped, shattered, but manage to build your jar back together, your once broken cracks now have the ability to shine light through them. I forgive many others from this past year, that have given me cracks and tried to break me. However, I thank you that much more because I can now shine my light through them in 2016 to hopefully inspire other people.
Most importantly I have to forgive myself. I have to forgive the magnitude of mistakes I made, the people that I hurt from large to small, the people that I may have shattered their own clay pots too. I truly am sorry to anyone I have hurt in 2015 for whatever circumstance that happened, whether you were school friends, work friends, family, or a complete stranger. I hope you to can forgive me, because in forgiveness you gain bravery, but above all you gain peace and healing. Every one of you reading this (if you’re honest with yourself), has hurt someone this year, whether it was mentally, physically, emotionally, at work, at school, at home, the list could go on. I hope you too can forgive yourself and leave it in 2015.
In spite of 2015 being an hard year, A LOT of good has come out of it and I still will choose to see that people are really good at heart. Thank you to everyone who has loved and supported me this past year, I couldn’t have done it without you! Heck, I wouldn’t be writing this blog and have founded YouAreMore without 2015! Cheers to that! I will leave y’all with this to think about as you too gear into the New Year of 2016..
“What I’ve learned from life is that for every inch of sadness sites a foot of happiness ahead. I’ve learned the simplest of times brings the grandest of pleasures and the hardest goodbyes often lead to the best hellos. I’ve learned that crazy chances guide us to unexpected discoveries and that tough times unveil the sincerity of people. I’ve learned that you have to hold onto your smile everyday and free yourself of that.”
Happy New Year! I hope & pray y’all have an amazing year full of good & bad that form you into a bigger, stronger, & beautiful person through out those 365 days. Stay tuned in 2016, because there is so many amazing things in store for YouAreMore!